Are you addicted to the internet?

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*Someone at work tells you a joke and you say LOL.
*You keep begging your friends to get an account "so we can hang out."
*you dream in text.
*being called a newbie is a *MAJOR* insult.
*you no longer type with proper punctuation, capitalization, or complete sentences.
*you begin to say heh heh heh instead of laughing.
*when someone says "What did you say?" you reply "Scroll up!"
*you find yourself sneaking away to the computer in the middle of the night when your spouse is asleep.
*you turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know you are online again.
*you know more about your MSN friends' daily routines than you do your own spouse's.
*you find yourself lying to others about your time on-line and when they complain that your phone was busy you claim it was off the hook.
*you would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much instead of the truth (all night online).
*your kids are standing at your side saying "daddy, please come cook dinner" and you would rather type another "LOL"
*you won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved.
*your dog leaves you.
*you have to ask what year it is.
*you write a letter like this..."dear tom, hiyas! how r u doin well i gotta go bbl!"
*you smile sideways. : -)
*you bring a bag lunch and a cooler to the computer.
*you have withdrawal symptoms if you are away from the puter for more than a few hours.
*you wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get online before you have your first cup of coffee.
*you have to inject No-Doz into your butt to keep it awake.
*you don't know where the time has gone.
*you get up at 2 am to go the bathroom but go turn on your computer instead.
*you stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno and lemme.
*your voicemail/answering machine message is "BRB, leave your s/n and I will TTYL."
*you type faster than you think.
*you want to be buried with your computer when it dies...or vice versa.
*you actually enjoy the fact that you are addicted.
*you can actually read and follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your tv screen at the end of a movie.
*you double click your tv remote.
*you set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check your mail" and while you were there you "just wanted to see who's on".
*You make a potty of your chair in front of your computer, so you don't have to stand up to take a dump.
*when you start running around with a knife in your hand trying to run faster like in Counter-Strike.
*You having sex with your wife and look her square in the eyes and call her a "n00b".
*When you walk into a butchers, you get annoyed and start cursing the butcher when you see a tin of SPAM.
*Everytime you turn, your hand moves to the left/right as if there is a mouse there.
*When somebody punches you in the face, you shout "OMFG AIMBOT!!1".
* When somebody talk to you, you draw your sword to his neck then you say: OMGAYLMFAO
*When you hear a car backfire, you jump to the floor and shout for your teammates to give you back up and tell them to take thier posistions.
*You go into the shop, you put your product on the counter and when the shop keeper says "50p please" ...your short on money, so your looking for a console to type in "GIVEALLMONEY".
*A girl goes up to you, she asks for your address because she likes the look of you and she is feeling excited and wants to come round....you give her your IP address.

This Post has 4 Comments Add your own!
Anonymous - May 23, 2008 at 11:10 PM

Are these jokes from 1992?? No one has or uses modems like that anymore.

Anonymous - May 24, 2008 at 9:09 AM

Wow. this is crap! And who's phone is busy these days wen you are online??

GloryMiles - January 29, 2009 at 6:31 AM

My child will spend every breathing second online gaming if I let him. In order to prevent my child from spending all the time while I am at work, I use parental control software Ez Internet Timer. It can stop all children’s on-line activity and block Internet browsers, e-mails, ftps or messengers according to my daily schedule and I'm relieved.

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